It’s Not My Fault

Have you ever been to a marriage conference? My man and I have been to a few over the years, and, without question, one of the topics is always about the importance of communication, which is at the very core of every healthy marriage.

We recently received a statement in the mail indicating that we were past due on a monthly obligation. Troy asked, “Did you forget to pay this?”

He thinks it is my fault…

I said, “I thought you would pay it. Why is it my fault?”

”I didn’t say it was your fault. I just asked why you didn’t pay it. Are you saying it’s my fault?” He questioned.

It’s so easy to point fingers, isn’t it? Since the opening chapters of Genesis, we see Adam blaming Eve and then Eve blaming the serpent. Eve’s exact words were, “…the serpent deceived me.”

Eve, at least, was right to bestow blame on the serpent, and Satan’s whispers continue to deceive us today. Look back at our conversation. Troy simply asked me if I forgot to pay the bill—he didn’t accuse me.

Prior to looking at the mail on that particular day we had been having a wonderful time. We had been on a couple of sales calls and had gotten a nice lunch. In the blink of an eye, tension arose. What happened?

Ephesians 6:16 says, “In addition to all, taking up the shield of faith with which you will be able to extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one.”

It’s easy to see in hindsight that an arrow had been shot in our direction to divert our attention from a lovely day. The moment could have been saved if one of us had simply replied, “I’m not sure how that got missed. I will take care of it today.”

We didn’t do that, however, and the calm quickly faded as storm clouds arose. Laughter turned into grunts and then I burned my hand while cooking dinner, causing me to say a word that readers won’t find in the Bible.

“Love does not act unbecomingly; it does not seek its own, it is not provoked, it does not take into account a wrong suffered.” 1 Corinthians 13:5

The old saying, “Nip it in the bud” seems appropriate—don’t let one thing lead to another.  As the end of the day approaches,

“…Don’t let the sun go down on your anger and do not give the devil an opportunity.” Ephesians 4:26-27

As night draws near and it’s time for bed, don’t let the frost in the air cause division. Snuggling is far more fun, and love never fails to bring comfort.